Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 17, 2017 22:40:04 GMT -6
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 18, 2017 8:00:48 GMT -6
You know.....space is a really big place   This is an accurate image to my comment. When someone gives me soace or I guve them space....that is what it looks like  |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 19, 2017 22:42:30 GMT -6
because I'm itching to bug them. itchy itchy itchy i've got the itchies! LOL!! Don't know why, but this made me laugh so hard  |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 20, 2017 15:58:37 GMT -6
because I'm itching to bug them. itchy itchy itchy i've got the itchies! LOL!! Don't know why, but this made me laugh so hard yeah, i try to have a sense of humor, but truth is, i'm constantly worried about my life going down the crapper. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Can I share this here?? ( please tell me if folks don't wanna read it. It's really revealing/long/annoying. Idk But it's something I wrote almost a year ago and I'm finding myself thinking/repeating it again. ahhh! my life! idk!) " I need emotional distance….the problem is that I DO need to talk and ask thimgs sometimes. (Ok, that was my firstreaction.)
Ok, in order now. You ARE the one to ask because I meantyou specifically. Like, do you think me weird or crazy…no, I mean I justhoped you didnt fear me and that if I ever do need to talk…ok, anyway. I am reassured….again!
On that aubject, yes…sorry that I have to keep asking …it IS so hard doing this over text, youknow? Ok, the weirdor problem thing is…well…I can kindof see you, hear you….butyouhaveNO CLUE about me. And that is a problem…not that I can do anything about this…but, yeah it iskindof one sided…maybe I feel I know you better…you are the type of person I would gravitate towards as a friend….but all of this is unfair anyway, for what I justsaid. And I have to make some distance, because that unfairness or…Idk, it just sucks, ithurts for me…it is ok. It is the way, just…but it is like there are so many things I want to say (not uncomfortable things, mind you, just day to day things…but like they flood out…like so many!…well, that is an obsession, I guess. I am not…I mean, …I mean you wpuld be this way for anyone you care about right?…I just maybe shouldnt care so much…or I have to keep it to myself…I guess, just admitting this to you, I DO hold back. Now,…I probably am in the wrong for even saying that. Just…I hold back for you and for me…so neither ofus get overwhelmed…
eh…forgot what I wanted to say. “Obsession” keeps glaring atme and I hate the connotation of that word. :/
maybe just that I will keep working on this.
the reaction stuff..hehe funny enough, I always think of that scene in Titanic when Jack says to Rose, oh you must be thinking blah blah. And shes like oh wasnt thonking that at all!
I guess, even knowing this andhow you said it, I still have this habit…omg! That is what I like about you! You can tell it…I mean…I mean you are like my conscience??? Um, I mean you just illuminate things that I should know but I cant always think of….is this like a muse? Or no…just you help me with ideas I need…like how is that bad?? Eh ok, nevermind. Losing the point here…um just yeah…I DO need to work on this…Iguess it gets confusing when people DO react or say whatyou kindof expected.
butthis time, I really did need a re assessment. My head was a little clouded and I honestly didnt know what you were going to say exactly.
ohhh, I just…like I finally find someone who I can talk to and or text to …have a “real” conversation with…so yeah, that is where the excitement comes in…but I atill have to have boundaries.
ok, that is all. Sorry formy babble. I kinda talked it all “outloud” to you. Maybe you can read this and see my thinking…but I will try to learn to write less and assume less…
cuz yeah, the factthat, well we seem so in tune…sometimea that leads to assumptions…no, see, it IS different with you! But then I take it on the forum and like if YOU dont see it and or…ok, so I have to work on my assumptions of how others react…this kindof thing is what I love (but also a few time hate) about allen. Mostly love….but just how he will say anything! Ok, I am again assuming, but like there is a bit of that…consistency??
ok ok, another poin,t, and last one, I love reading good writing, and I guess maybe I am a writer (although the mosti commit to is writing letters. I cant justwrite for myself. I have a problem with this need ofinstant gratification? Ok nevermind) but damnot! Um ok well was gonna….ok I will just say I like reading your writing…among others works.
ok, now I am done. I guess I could have just read that and taken the advice, but in typical fashion, here I write it all down…maybe I shpuld write a book! Journaling my life just seems to drab…except my interactions….ok sorry rambling. Justtrying to move forward here though, you know?
ahh, ok….I will think about the survey.
ok, back to our lives. 🙂 take care!
oh gah! I always forget how long I might have written these and then am in for a shockerwhen I postit (cant see it in this quick response so…anyway, ok bracing myself. 😛 no looking back. Ah ijust hope you can laugh aboutthis like I try to! :/ )
Good day!" |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 21, 2017 10:11:04 GMT -6
If you worry constantly aboutnyour life going down the crapper, then you are basically letting your life go down the crapper.
What you worry about can own you.
Stop that worrying and try to find the optimism. You will feel better. Doesnt mean being optimistic 24/7 because life doesn't work like that, but your worry focus can cause even more depression
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 21, 2017 15:12:03 GMT -6
seems I should say something about that, but honestly, no good words come to me right now. Meh!
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 21, 2017 18:33:00 GMT -6
That's ok. Everyone has moments like that.
Blackswan tends to bring some good optimism for me and I have moments of "meh" not much to say.
Im not perfect happy go lucky 24/7, kiss people's ass nonsense.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 22, 2017 15:20:53 GMT -6
^^Thanks ashima ♥ I'm not happy go lucky 24/7 either...do try to be optimistic though...
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 23, 2017 9:31:33 GMT -6
You're welcome. I was once called an Optimistic pessimist. Which basically would be saying I am balanced |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 23, 2017 11:46:10 GMT -6
I'm really thinking that some people just WANT me to be depressed! Well, fuck them!! or just fuck this thought in my head! I don't know. I can't be around sad people because they never really want my help...on the other hand, when I'm sad, it does help when someone is there....but I'm not most people. idk bleh! (happy in my own little world trying to be anyhow) |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 23, 2017 11:54:04 GMT -6
Hey, there are people who want you to ve depressed just like them. It's actually pretty fucked up. Ive experienced that from someone. He also was a sociopath. That was such a horrible moment in my life. But just to be a "bitch" i rubbed it in his face who I'd rather have children with Dont fuck with me! |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 23, 2017 12:42:09 GMT -6
yeah, i can't really use that to rub it in people's faces. I really don't know what i can use. eh! best to let it go. I'm not even sure who I need to be mad at, that's the problem! All I know is I get frustrated with the whole lot of 'em! You can only compromise your sanity for so long! haha (frustrated doesn't equal hate. but i just have to let stuff go right now)
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Mar 23, 2017 15:01:54 GMT -6
Lol I said it deliberately so that guy would leave me alone. All it did was cause him to rant more Ignoring him was and is the best solution! If you ever want to get into a never ending battle with someone.... he would be the guy you would want to battle with. Geeez, he needs to be in a rubber room with no contact with the human race! Lol, doesnt matter now. Yes it was HELL dealing with him, now I laugh about it. Plus, he was not even remotely attractive GAG. Lol yep i require decent looking imo. |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 2, 2017 11:03:00 GMT -6
Laughter is a great remedy. Work out and talk out your past issues with someone if possible. You'd be surprised when others open up with their life experiences and growing from it.  We all have bad days. We definitely can find the good in each day! |
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2017 11:12:14 GMT -6
Today, I'm irritated and if I focus too much on it, it will lead me to being depressed.
Instead I think what the fuck is the fuck is their problem and laugh at how ridiculous this shit is.
|
|
